Day 10: The Colour Changing Quill

I can still hear him in my head at times when I am alone, when I am doing nothing, when I am staring unto the nothingness. It gives me the odd feeling that I am mad and it leaves me blank. Then I shake it out of my head and tell myself, I’m better now and I paint that smile into my face. But I could not just deny the fact that even though it wasn’t very much long ago, it still haunts me like a ghost from the past that was brought back to life. The feeling visits me like an old friend who hasn’t seen me in a while and it would linger for a little period of time. It might have missed seeing those tears fall.

The feeling of sorrow and resentment once in a while creep in my head and I’ll feel a little bit hurt again. It’s the most predictable baggage I’ve got and I really have to let go of it now. I know a part of me hasn’t totally freed the thought of it and is still grasping a tiny portion of the rope connecting me to things. But I just want to tell you I’m doing good, all set to free that part. I am just waiting for the perfect time.

I admit that most of the time now, I feel like It was all part of my writings. That everything was merely a creation of my vivid imagination, it got publicized and is now obsolete just like the fan fictions I create. Maybe this is a defense mechanism used by my ego to protect myself from feeling the same way as before but whatever it is, it’s helping. 

I know one day, I’ll look back to those days and really see it as a chapter written to fill the gaps of my boring life and it was there to help develop my character.

Happy to say that i mean all the smiles i have now.. =)
Just wanted to share some photos while i was goofin' around with my cousin, Ana.

Change Nothing

Last night the eleventh season of American Idol came to a wrap at the Nokia Theatre crowning another white guy with guitar or more known as WGWG. Phillip Phillips, the small town hero from Leesburg, Georgia was the 5th WGWG to win American Idol leaving the Asian-Latina from Chula Vista California, Jessica Sanchez as the runner up.

I am not a professional writer and I wrote this article because I wanted to pour all the bitterness I have over Jessica’s defeat in the fight for the Idol crown.

Right now I do have an idea what runs into your mind as you go on reading this, if you didn’t root for her the way we did. You might be saying I am just one of her fans who resented Phillip. I don’t resent him to tell you. I am even one of those girls who fancy him and Colton Dixon because of their good looks. I was just saddened that it wasn’t Jessica who won the title. And I know that millions of her fans out there are having the same sentiments as mine.

I am from the Philippines and you might say I am exaggerating but I barely had a wink the night before the show. I wqs anxious and uxcited. I only uad the chance tu shut my eyes for 2 hours and woke up to watch the finale that we all waited for 5 months. The only reason I bothered watching American Idol was because she was in it. She was the very reason why I looked forward to this show every week and now that she’s done with it, I am done as well, unless she gets invited to sing again.

I am and had always been a fan of Jessica from the very beginning, not because I am a Filipino but it was a plus since she made me really proud of being one. It was because she touched my heart thru her voice like no one did. The world experienced the same and knew who deserved to win but its American Idol and it's not World Idol which boiled down to the fact that it was all up to America’s decision. It had always been that way for this show, it wasn’t even who sings best, but it had always depended on who got the highest number of votes.

Flashbacks of campaigning so hard every week hit my head as I started to have goose bumps and didn’t know what to feel. Jessica always was excited and thrilled when asked about how she feels and we, her Blujays would always be filled with anxiousness until she’s safe. But maybe, the truth was her heart’s pounding much faster than ours every time. We were all left to hold on to our faith, hoping that she’ll win.

And as the lights dimmed for the remaining minutes of Scotty McCreery’s reign, I closed my eyes and crossed my fingers whispering her name under my breathe as if I was saying an incantation. To me, it felt like the whole world stopped for a while wishing to hear her name come out of Ryan Seacrest’s mouth. To again make the Earth tremble whenever her name’s being spoken on the stage. Yet the quiver I waited for didn't come and my heart totally tore apart when Phillip’s name was announced. I got teary eyed and cried in silence hearing her being called a runner up and seeing her leave the center stage. My hands were qctually shakinguas I immediatelu played her wiuning song, Change Nothing. I imagined it along with other Blujays being played at Nokia Theatre that very moment but it only remained as an imagination. But be known to all that it was being played at that very moment all over the world despite her not winning American Idol.

It was more than a TV show or competition for us, it was Jay’s journey. It was our baby girl’s story from week after week after week as she tried to deliver the messages of her songs to people… as she tried to win their hearts. And we wanted it so bad for her because we knew how hard she worked just so she could be there.

I am actually honored to be able to hear someone like her sing because there won’t be another Jessica Sanchez. She’s just way above ordinary and has her own style. She’s the SWAGGERNAUT.

As for the people saying nothing’s new with her, that she’s just another one singing a song in the stage just like everybody else. Heck I dare you to sing the way she does, and if you can reach her level or surpass her then you are given the chance to rant all you want about how usual she is. She isn’t harming anyone of you so stop insulting and criticizing her unless you’re going to help her produce and sell albums. But if you can’t, then please just keep your comments to yourself. Let’s learn to respect people if we want to be respected. Remember that Jessica has her army behind her and will be watching very closely. Blujays won’t fade in twitter or in any other site just because American Idol is over.

She really has come a long way from being that 11 year old girl who auditioned and stood in front of the America’s Got Talent judges, from being the Youtube sensation doing covers after covers after covers in front of their computer at home.

The American Idol Finale even looked like her concert. Besides she and Jennifer Holliday just had the best duet on Idol history on And I Am Telling you I’m Not Going. She is already a star. American Idol is one of her stepping stones to reaching her destiny. It is just the beginning of a wonderful and fruitful career. It was amazing that while the competition was still running there already had been record deals waiting for her.

Jessica Sanchez in our hearts is our American Idol and we will always be behind her no matter what happens. It’s not that God didn’t hear our prayers for her, but it’s more of the fact that God already knew what an amazing future is in store whether she win American Idol or not. She already had been living her dream a long long time ago and being in the finale was just a bonus. Just like what her winning song says, I could do better There's always something they don't know the hell we've been through… That's when I wanna change nothing.

There’s no reason to be sad, really, as it’s just a title and the real winner will be the LAST ONE STANDING in the music industry. If I am given the chance to change the course of events, I am gonna CHANGE NOTHING.

Blujays are proud of her. The whole world is proud of her.

Jessica Sanchez is a disease and she’s CONTAGIOUS.

So watch out.

She’s a real WORLD IDOL.

BLUJAYS ALWAYS WORK HARD AND STAY HUMBLE.

Jay is so happy for Phillip and so we should be happy for him, too. What makes Jessica happy makes us happy as well. Let us  be proud of the both of them. They are both talented.

Enjoy the first Single 

CHANGE NOTHING

by Jessica Sanchez

JESSICA SANCHEZ in iTunes

Click the links to download the songs in iTunes

The One Way Road

As how they have usually described life, it is a one way road. You can’t turn around and say “Ooops! I got it wrong. I was supposed to go there.” Life doesn’t work that way and I am sure you are fully aware of that. There are no U-turns. In life all you can do is to walk/ run straight ahead, keep on moving forwardq You can’t gouback, you canqt even stop oruelse you’ll cause traffic.

I don’t exactly know what I am trying to write, right now. I just feel like writing. I just hope by the end of this article I’d be able to impart something worth pondering on. The pitter patter of the rain is probably adding up to my melancholic spirit as I haven’t been feeling really well for the past weeks.

Now, no matter how that one way road stretches, you don’t go through it without dealing with bumps and some twists and turns. It consists with millions of intersections which again lead to many new paths, and then on those again come new ones.

Life is an interminable connection of paths. It will never cease to have new bends and these holds a lot of events that will definitely contain more defining moments in one’s life.

And as our life goes on, and we continue to move forth, the paths start to grow even wilder, bumpier and confusing. The paths are so tangled sometimes you lose track and find yourself on a previous trail you’ve been through, yet the events that you experience doesn’t happen twice. There will always be a big difference. Always unique from the other.  

Life is meant to work that way. It’s not easy, it’s a bit wicked to those who don’t know how to fight back and how to survive. It’s perplexing with all the decisions one has to go through every time one new curve appears. When one chooses a bend to enter, they turn their back to the previous path because they can’t certainly go back and cannot definitely pass through the other intersections again. It’s a tough choice. It’s a big one. One move and it alters the whole course of one’s world.

So decide wisely but never forget to enjoy life coz as what I have said you only pass once.

Rock the Vote for Jessica Sanchez

Its May everyone and i hope you all had a good start for the month. And it's nearly voting period again for American Idol Season 11. The end is really near we can almost see the finish line.

We all are excited on who's gonna win.

I am here again to campaign for Jessica Sanchez. I am asking (already BEGGING) you to cast your votes on her thru FACEBOOK, SKYPE and AT&T.

Here's the Link to the voting page on facebook. American idol Online voting

Remember to keep being consistent. Jessica needs our votes more than ever.

EVERY SINGLE VOTE COUNTS.

So do not hesitate to vote for Jay.

Filipino Artists were already asking for your support and votes as well. We need all the votes we can get. 

again let us ROCK the VOTE for JESSICA SANCHEZ until the very end. 
thank you so much.