Broken Thoughts

That night, my phobia of the dark came back that I had to turn the lights on with a quick run. I curled myself in a corner and wrapped myself with my blanket. I felt cold that i had to pull it tighter around me imagining that i was being hugged because i badly needed one. I need not force my eyes open for  I found it hard to sleep. Mr. Sandman finally gave me back my free time but I hated it. I was up all night thinking about things with my eyes welling up in tears. I could even barely  see through my foggy glasses. I again found it hard to breathe as the rain poured heavier by the minute in congruence to how I feel. Funny that it had to pour the moment i started crying.

I felt tired and weary.

I felt alone.

My head pounded like it’s gonna blow and I didn’t know what to do.

But I knew what I wanted.

I knew I didn’t and never wanted to go back.

I wondered how it was like to live without thinking about what's gonna happen tomorrow. That kind of feeling when you don't have anything to fear and everyday feels amazing. That you don't have to be frightened of the unknown when you're assured that you're not gonna wake up alone tomorrow with tears in your eyes and a broken heart.

What a fortunate turn out of events that history had to repeat itself. 

I tightly hugged my pillow and closed my eyes.

I, again, just got my heart broken.